Live, Laugh, Love, && Let Go.

I just finished my third final now I only have two to worry about on monday then I'm done for the semester! Its really been a really long semester butI have enjoyed my classes except for one, art history the teacher is an ice queen and basically everyone dislikes her. It's about to be a week since the whole breakup thing and I feel alot better, I've been putting things into perspective and figuring out what's important. Over winter break I'm ready to relax and enjoy myself because its time that I get back to worrying about me and what I want. I'm supposed to be graduating December 2009 so I really have to figure out what I'm going to do with my life. I'm not who I thought I would be or where I thought I would be at 21 but who actually follows their plans without a hitch? I'd like to meet that person and then get them high so they could let go a little. I really feel now more than ever that life is about making mistakes. I remember thinking last week that heartbreak was going to take time to heal but not really believing it but now I really do. Everyday gets a little better and the moments are there from time to time but I feel like I could really become a better person. Six years in a relationship can take alot out of someone especially when it begins so early in life. I was only 15 and I'm letting go now. I grew up with him but I also grew apart. I was so focused on being a good girlfriend for him that I didnt see what was good for me. I'm getting to a point where I'm excited about what life could bring to me and how much I'm going to learn now that I have all this free time haha. I can reconnect with myself, my friends, my family and my interests. I havent thought about all of these things in so long and even though a part of me still loves him I know that he was a setback and being afraid of being alone isnt a good enough reason to stay with someone. I'm young I have time. I want and need to be on my own for awhile and explore life. Life is really too short to be constantly unhappy and wondering what if. 2009 will be a good year for me and for now I just have to wait and see what it will bring me. I really want to grow as a person and build up my personal strength that had been broken down, I really did lose alot of myself over the past few years. It's important to love yourself before you can love anyone else. Right now the plan is to love me, love life, laugh and learn, and let go. A new chapter of my life is beginning and I'm going to take control and make the very best of it. :)